Is this relationship right for me?

When our needs aren’t being met in our relationships, we may feel confused and uncertain about what to do or how to move forward. We start questioning, “Is this relationship right for me?”
 
Relationship decisions are among the most challenging to make. Feeling dissatisfied in our relationship weighs heavily on us and may impact how we show up at work, too. When our needs aren’t being met in our personal relationships, it adds to our overall stress level, takes a toll on our sense of joy, and can impact our ability to stay fully present at work.
 
My clients come to me because they are unhappy in their relationship. They aren’t getting their needs met and they feel unfulfilled and disappointed. There is little intimacy, joy, or meaningful communication.
 
Here is how my clients have described the state of their relationship:
 
“We are roommates”
“We are stuck in monotony”
“We are trudging along”
“We are stagnant”
 
My clients reach out when they don’t know how to move forward. One former client said that when you’re facing these kinds of challenges, you can’t always go to your friends because they may not be neutral or objective. They may offer support or join in on a pity party or gripe session but these responses are not helpful.
 
She said some friends may try to tell you what to do to fix it. But in this client’s case, she felt like she had already tried everything she could think of to make things better. She was feeling resentful because she was the only one putting in the effort and didn’t want to do anything else. She was really questioning if she should stay in her relationship and needed to make a decision so she could move ahead.
 
When it comes to relationship decisions, we want to make the right one. We don’t want to hurt people or let people down. We may worry about what people will think about our decision. As women, we naturally care for other people and sometimes we forget to focus on our needs, too.
 
In order to move forward, we need to:

• Get clear on our needs, desires, and expectations and examine what’s realistic to expect from their partner
• Communicate our needs and desires more clearly
• Consider other ways to get some of our needs met rather than putting all the burden on our partner, who may not be able to give us everything we want
• Explore our alternatives and address our fears about making the decision and moving forward
• Discern between fear-based and intuitive-based decision making so we can choose what’s right for us
• Begin taking action based on our decisions and respond to what happens next

 
 
These are the kinds of things I help my clients with. Relationship decisions have lasting impact and require time, attention and thoughtfulness. I come alongside my clients when they aren’t sure who else to turn to for support. I offer guidance and support so they can make the decision that feels right for them and then take the aligned actions that move them forward.
 
Here is what one client said at the end of our time together:
 
“I had been struggling with this decision for awhile. I wanted an answer and felt unsettled. I was overwhelmed by it – it was impacting all other areas of my life. I had never pushed myself to sit and think through all the options. You provided a safe environment for me to do this.” Once this client made her decision, she felt more settled. She acknowledged that her decision was a conscious one because she had done the work and allowed herself to fully explore all the alternatives. She was no longer choosing by default.
 
If you’re experiencing any of this in your own relationship, I am here to support you. I offer a safe, judgment-free space for you to share and question. Because I’ve been there too and know firsthand how challenging it can be to navigate our personal relationships.
 
If you’d like to connect, let’s schedule a short call. You can send me a direct message or click here to schedule some time with me.
 
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