Are your relationships contributing to your sense of joy or detracting from it? Do the people you spend the most time with provide emotional support and contribute to your wellbeing?
How you feel when you're with someone and/or after you leave them can be a huge clue. If you consistently feel tension when with someone, or you feel drained after spending time together, it may mean that you may need to set boundaries or create some extra space. I've had to do this with friendships, professional acquaintances, and romantic partners. Any relationship that starts to feel consistently depleting may need attention and a different kind of action. A word of caution... check yourself first. Are you doing something to create tension in the relationship? Have you communicated your needs and expectations? Remember that not all expectations we have of other people are realistic... we can make requests and state our desires, but the other party can choose whether or not they fulfill our request. And likewise, if they don't, we get to choose how we respond to that. If boundaries are necessary, be sure to communicate them in a way the other person can understand. Boundaries can cover any aspect of the relationship... how much time you spend together, how you spend that time, how you communicate with each other, and more. Remember.... We are each responsible for our own wellbeing and joy. It's not fair to expect others to make us happy. We do that for ourselves. Then anyone we spend time with, if we spend most of our time with people we enjoy, add to the joy we create for our self. It's like icing on the cake. If you need some guidance and support in evaluating your relationships and needs, expectations, or boundaries... reach out and let's see how I can help.
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